Communication

the older i get, the less i'm interested in communicating with others. what a shame. i'm an idiot. or am i just really smart? the thing about having a conversation with someone, is assuming they know how to communicate with you. if you are like me, i head to the hills and bury myself with-in the closest dryad i can find as soon as i realize this is not happening how it should. people are so different on so many levels. some levels are good and some are bad. the moment i realize i'm in conversation with someone and that it can only end badly, i just nod and agree, unless of course, i feel like i have a strong point to make. i do not partake in stooping to ones level to get them to stop talking. that sir, i do not do. i most of the time stand there and take it. i'm like your average doormat, $8 special at walmart. these are sketchy times for me. those are the times that i gnaw my tongue raw until i can't take it anymore and vomit every word my soul has to offer in the best, kind way i know how. having said that, the person on the receiving end.....ya this is where it gets tricky and you more than likely, just set yourself up for the biggest verbal slamming ever b/c you have just challenged someone who knows what they know, believe it to be true, and refuse to accept that they might not be right, b/c how could any one person be wrong when it comes to their beliefs? these are the times that the most horrible words a man or woman can breathe off the very breath off their tongue. it's driven from their emotions, not their soul, heart, or common sense. it's pure emotion and reaction that is so diluted by the drive to get it out, vomit your ground! damn't you are right! this is when you lower your head down as the dragon speaks and spews, and take every word as if you are physically being punched in the face and blow by blow, you shrink until you are nothing but dirt from the driveway on the rug in your entry way. i am sad for people who are supercilious and i am sad for those that have to have conversations with the above, who are so tender that a simple rain drop, snowflake, rustle of leaves, a hug, beautiful ray of sunshine, the faces of their children, or a friendly smile from a stranger can bring them to tears b/c of not just their affection for the world, but b/c they have such an appreciation for the kindness and love that they see in it all.